I Kept Helping Everyone and Started Falling Behind Myself
I kept helping classmates study until I realised I was neglecting my own revision. Setting small boundaries let me keep helping people without falling behind myself.
If you only have a minute.
- Situation
- I kept helping classmates study until I realised I was neglecting my own revision. Setting small boundaries let me keep helping people without falling behind myself.
- What they tried
- I started setting limits.
- What they learned
- Helping someone is good. Helping everyone until you're the one unprepared isnt.
A TURNING POINT“Helping someone is good.”
Problem
Before exams, people in my class would ask me for help. "Can you explain this chapter?" "Send your notes?" "How did you solve question 7?" I usually said yes. I liked helping. Also, if I'm being completely honest, I liked being the person people came to.
Struggle
Then I realised something slightly embarrassing. Everyone else was finishing their doubts. I wasn't finishing my syllabus. I'd spend half an hour explaining something on call, then another twenty minutes finding notes for someone, then reply to five messages. By the end of the night I'd barely done my own revision. And somehow I was annoyed at everyone else. Even though I had said yes every single time.
Action
I started setting limits. If someone asked a small doubt, fine. If it was going to become an hour-long tutoring session, I said I couldn't do it right then. Sometimes I sent the page or method instead of explaining the whole chapter. At first I felt selfish. Then I remembered I also had the exam.
Outcome
Nothing dramatic happened. Nobody stopped being my friend. People figured things out. And I finally had enough time to do my own work properly. I still help people. Just not at the cost of doing nothing for myself.
The lesson
Helping someone is good. Helping everyone until you're the one unprepared isnt.
